Everyone is looking for happiness.
But happiness is not a goal.It is a result of doing what you like and relating honestly to other people. Happines is about being your own person, making you own decisions, doing what you want because you want to do it, and living your own life to please yourself. It's about being independent, allowing others to be free and seking the best in yourslef and in the world.
It's so easy to do the opposite-to cling to others expecting to be taken care of, to control people and blame them when things go wrong, to be insincere and play at relationships and careers rather than commit, to tease rather than respond, and to live on the fringe of others' lives rather than in the middle of your own.When you do not live your life as your own person you live an unhappy life indeed. You have the sense that you life is going nowhere, that life has little meaning, and that the meaning it does have loses its substance when you examine it closely.
Your life is supposed to be for yourself.
Your life is given to you to create its meaning. You have no one to blame if your life does not turn out the way you wanted it to be. No one owes you anything. You are the only person who can make a lasting difference. A ittle boost of support here or there means nothing unless you have committed to go all the way yourself. No matter what happens.
No promises that anyone ever made to you have the power to make a lasting difference.
No betrayal or abondonment has the power to limit your growth or blunt your success unless you need an excuse for failing that badly.
Putting it bluntly, you have the ability to get over just about everything. And if you intend to be happy during this life you are going to have to get over a lot all the time.
The first thing you have to get over is the belief that someone is coming in your life who is going to make all the difference.
Don't count on anyone coming to rescue you, give you the big break, defeat your enemies, stand up for you, recognize your worth, and open doors.
You deserve to be happy, but you also deserve everything that you accept. So look at your unhappiness. It is a record of your failure to be your own person.
Your unhappiness is really nothing more than a reminder that you have some work to do to be happy again. Because being happy is liking the way you feel; if you are unhappy it means that you don't like the way you feel.
You are the person who is supposed to do something about that.Being happy requires that you take subtle but important risks all the time. You need to assert yourself. Avoid manipulation, pointless arguments, and confrontations.
You need to tell the truth and correct ur lies. You need to stop playing the vicetim so you can enjoy you success without feeling guilty. To find happiness you need to be your own person, not a pretender. You need to let go for your expectations of what you think life should be like so that you don't unrealistically judge others and find them lacking and ungiving.
You need to give up living in the pat. You need to learn to forgive and let go in order to move on. you need to learn to listen in orer to bring out the best in others.
You need to tke yourself seriously, but not so seriously that you have to be perfect all the time or cannot admit your errors or weaknesses. You need to understand that you are alays growing. So you must continually be aware of the compromises that inhibit your growth and the relayionships where you feel you give away too much.
You need a purpose in life. You need to work at that purpose and create the life you want, not live in empty hope f deliverance. Being happy takes work, the work of life. Since you are going to live your own life, you might as well live it as you best.
